Centrali' Times - Abern, Obern 7, 10025


Headlines

Briss Beaten!

In the most dramatic example of this cities increasing level of violence, Lord Briss was beaten outside the Neuvo District home of Artist Svents Filres.

On Obern 5th Lord Briss left the home of Svents Filres carrying a three foot statue of the mythical goddess Abris. The statue was carved in Jade in Filres' exceptional style. Her fiery hair done in clever metallics. Truly a piece destined to become great... and so caught up in his new aquisition, Lord Briss was caught unaware as two mean stepped from behind a nearby shrubbery and beat him senseless with bats.

Fortunately for Lord Briss, someone was there to punish this crime before it progressed to far. Worker Tims, a member of our Solarium, was returning to his temple when he saw what was happening. Without any concern for his own safety he jumped into the fray. "I didn't have time to think, a man was in trouble", says Tims. With the change in odds, the two assailents were quick to run away. Neither Lord Briss nor Worker Tims could provide accurate descripts.

Since Lord Briss is only one of five Lords known to still be on our Island, this reporter will sleep better knowing that the Solarium has dispatched an unknown number of men to keep Lord Briss safe in case this was not an isolated attack!

Centralia Readies for the Games!

That time of year is coming. The Annual Festival of Games will soon be upon us! This year promises to be the biggest Festival ever. Every hotel, hostel and boarding house is already booked for the event. Some of the outlaying islands are also being sold out.

What makes this year so special? Lots. Word of the shrinking erection; perfect weather; and, of course, the fierce competition of this years skimmer races. At last years race all of the Centralia teams were beated out by an upstart team from South Port. Our boys have been prepping all year for this event and will not let us down!

Oh... and of course Keever Pelve is unleashing his latest flavoour of ice cream... While that may not be most people's reason to be excited, it works for me.


Editorials

What about the Bums?, Anonymous

Centralia used to be a shining example of civilization, now everywhere I go I'm tripping over a Prall. They don't even apologize anymore or get meekly out of the way, they yell at you! I've never been so frightened or angry than this week when a Prall came up to me and made some joke about Leader Prem. If there was a way to keep the city clean without them I'd be all for burning their city to the ground!

Classifieds/Personals

Information Wanted

I'll give 15,000 silver pieces to anyone who can tell me what bastards whacked me the other day! I'll keep your identity secret and deal with 'em quite like. Swing by my house or just send a messenger. --Lord Briss of Centralia